62. The Atmosphere at Old Trafford

Prawn sandwich, anyone?

Compare to #39

61. Gazza's Tears

60. Winning is beautiful

See: Sir Alex Ferguson

59. Winning is not everything

See: Arsene Wenger

58. Managers smoke

See: Johann Cruyff:

57. The Cruyff Turn

56. Roberto Baggio's Ponytail

55. When Chelsea spend money they are evil but when United spend money they are "shrewd"

In the summer of 2007 Sir Alex Ferguson spent over 75 million pounds on Nani, Hargreaves, Anderson and Tevez.

54. You can play it on a table

53. It's Low Cost

Take this orphanage in Africa:


"All you need is a ball..."

52. Barcelona will not hire Jose Mourinho

*

For Jose Mourinho beauty is a controversial subject. He just likes winning. And Barcelona like both beauty and winning. And that my friends makes the likes of Barcelona and Arsenal MORE ambitious than most clubs in the world. The standard for winning beautifully is much higher...than at Old Trafford or...wherever Jose Mourinho will be next season.

51. FIFA ?

Yes, FIFA is beautiful.

(You must say only good things about FIFA, otherwise...)

50. All colours play it

49. White people play it

48. Black people play it

47. Skill trumps nationalism

Brazil's Croatian or Croatia's Brazilian:

Eduardo da Silva

46. You can grow up in a soccer wasteland but end up playing for England

Like this lucky man:


Calgary's Owen Hargreaves.

45. The England Shirt

"Beautiful, baby, beautiful" --Austin Powers

44. Short Shorts

Circa 1970-1980. Soccer should bring these babies back. The chicks will go crazy. After thought: so will the men if Sepp has his way (see #11).

43. Cantona with his collar up

42. The Bicycle Kick

41. You can play it in the rain

40. The Possibility for Redemption

One minute you can be the biggest cheat ever and the next you can score the greatest goal of all-time:

When he spoke of the "Hand of God", was Maradona also thinking about the power of the second goal?

39. The atmosphere at Anfield

...they say whether you're home or away...it's a special, beautiful place...

38. Soccer Moms

37. There is no violence

Not on the field:

Not in the stands:

Not in the streets:

...unlike other shite, neanderthal sports like...well...any other sport you can name...

36. Bob Marley played it

35. You Can't Use Your Hands

Like those other shite sports:

I mean how hard is it to play a game with your hands? But the feet, the feet, that's where true beauty comes from...

34. Life is Beautiful

And nothing is more beautiful than life...

33. You can bring in the Italians

...when you need to take your "invention" to the next level...

32. You can have sex at the office

...and make 4 million pounds a year...as manager of England...

31. The Americans will win the World Cup

Get over it. It's inevitable. When the Americans put their minds to something:

...America the beautiful.

30. You can do only one thing really well but that is enough to make you captain of england

Set piece:

Well...alright...you've got a good attitude too. But why on earth did you never learn to dribble?

29. You can grow up in a favella and become king of the world:

Like this man:

28. Johan Cruyff In A Barcelona Shirt

Can you imagine the Dutch master in any other shirt? Perfect. Beautiful.

27. Johan Cruyff In An Ajax Shirt

Can you imagine the Dutch master in any other shirt? Perfect. Beautiful.

26. Johan Cruyff in a Holland Shirt

Can you imagine the Dutch master in any other shirt? Perfect. Beautiful.

25. The Juventus Shirt

The most recongnizable soccer shirt in the world:

Simplicity is beauty.

24. It Can Get You Into Great Shape

But you have to play the game every day. And say no to drugs. And food...

23. You Can Travel The World

Soccer takes players and fans to stadiums around the world. And along the way they can have travel experiences that others would pay good money for - the food, the wine, the music, the language, the countryside, the beaches. Rome, Paris, Barcelona, Rio, New York - they all have great soccer teams. Whoops, may be not New York. There is something called the MLS in the United States but no one travels there for both soccer and culture. That's what we're talking about here. For the most part, you can travel the world in style just by being in soccer. It really is one of the beautiful things about the game.

22. Michel Platini With His Shirt Untucked

Ahh...those were the days. And he may have had his socks rolled down too! And no shinpads. It really was a beautiful game...then.

And no other game really had this kind of aesthetic. Can you image NFL "football" players without a helmet for instance? No, it is the round ball game with its absence of equipment that always was and always will be...the most beautiful.

21. David Beckham Getting Off An Airplane

The man can do no wrong. He can wear any hair style - even the toussled-getting-off-an-airplane-look - and the world will think him beautiful (Beautiful Beckham) or sexy (Sexy Becksy).

And the man doesn't have to be The Best Player In The World to be The Richest Player In The World.

20. The Barcelona Unicef Shirt

It was beautiful in it's original form. And the club for years refused to generate money by tampering with that original beauty. No ads they said. Never! But then they decided to experiment with their holy garment and came up with something perhaps better:

And all of the extra cash is going to a good cause. FC Barcelona. FC Beautiful.

19. The Barcelona Shirt

The most recongnizable soccer shirt in the world:

Simplicity is beauty.

18. A Player Can Become So Talented That He Doesn't Have To Kick Another Ball Ever Again

I mean if you were as good as Riqueleme, why would you ever want to play again?

This stuff about him being recalled to the Argentinian national team after not being able to get a game with any club team in the world, must be a real nuisance to the great number 10.

17. There Is No More Racism In Soccer

Well...it's almost gone Mr. Eto'o. Very soon, very soon. Then it will be beautiful, really beautiful.